My friend was chatting with me and she told me that when she makes goals, she gets them. All the time. She has no problem with the goal getting. For some reason, her problem right now is the goal making. Because she didn’t know specifically what goal she wanted to go after.
It got me thinking of why I made goals in the first place.
You see, we usually make goals because there is something that’s lacking or missing in life. If we feel that we’re complete, then the need for a goal isn’t there. But since it is human nature to always want to have more/do more/be more, two reasons why we don’t have a goal is because we are unclear or we are afraid. (Future journal topic)
When we feel that something is lacking, more often than not, there’s usually something deeper behind it. A core quality that is not being fulfilled or realized or nourished. Ideally, when we set goals, it is to fulfill that hole where the core quality lies. If we go after the goal, as just a goal, then the core quality gets left out. At the end of the day, even if we get the goal, however happy we feel, it still feels incomplete, because we haven’t accomplished filling the core quality.
Take for example. A money goal. Say I want more money. Say I want a P1,000,000 in savings and I go after it. The core quality behind it is the feeling that I am worthy. However, I just go after the goal, and not the core quality. So I do everything to earn the money. And when I get it, I still don’t feel worthy so I just want more money after that because it won’t be enough. And the cycle continues. If I go after being worthy, then I act on that. The goal centers around it. So will the actions that accompany it. The goal now becomes just a manifestation. Same results, but different feelings of accomplishment.
Here’s my core qualities I’m working on. I’m working on being responsible and being able to make things happen.
However, here’s something I also discovered. When I come to realize what quality I am working on, the goal manifestation becomes a little bit tougher. Not because I’m doing something different. Because the being behind it is different. I’m not doing something (action) to get the results (goal) in order to be something (quality). In the process to be different and work on my core qualities, I first have to be something (responsible) in order to do something (work harder/smarter, get other sources of income) and eventually get the results (have more money). Makes sense?
Trust me when I say that this is the hardest thing to do for me right now and that the goal that accompanies this core qualities is extra difficult. If I tell you about it, you may tell me, it’s easy peasy. But since the core quality is my current resistance, just doing it is kinda difficult.
*** To be continued ***